Monday, January 11, 2010

Make a Wish

One of the most fascinating things I learned in my youth was that if you are terminally ill you can use the Make a Wish Foundation to do whatever you want. I vowed that if I died I wasn't going to go out like some punk bitch. I had to be prepared to wish for something that no one else could get their hands on. I thought about and settled on the following options after years of serious consideration.

3. WWF

Wrestle in a main event, despite being a pre-teenaged girl.

2. Appear in an 'N Sync video

I know this sounds like any thirteen year olds dream - and to be fair, yes, I thought of it when I was thirteen - but there is STRATEGY behind it:

- With one music video appearance I would definitely meet the group. At that point it was almost certain they would be charmed by me and we would be life long friends. 1st point.

- Everyone would wonder who that cool girl in the 'N Sync video is. 2nd point.

- They would probably ask me to sing a part in the song. 3rd.

- The song would be a huge hit and I would be immortalized.

1. Saturday Night Live

Initial wish was to host. Later, in my late teens, I decided I'd be pretty content to appear as an extra in sketch. Present day's form of the dream is just to observe the cast and writers for the week as they prepare for the show. Secretly this wish still relies on the power of my charisma to make some new friends in high places.